How we helped Zain feel like he belongs as a young carer

“Life changed for me and my family overnight” 

When Zain was 12, his mum had a stroke on Mother’s Day. He remembers it was a lovely day spent at his grandparents’ home with his younger brother and older sister, but when they returned home in the evening, his mum collapsed as she was going to bed. Zain’s sister called an ambulance which took her to hospital, but at the time, he didn’t realise the seriousness of what had happened. 

“Life changed for me and my family overnight,” Zain says. “After three months when mum was well enough to come home it became clear that things would never be the same. The stroke affected the left side of her body and meant she couldn’t do simple movements like walking or raising an arm to put on a jumper without help.  

“Dad still had to go to work, but mum could no longer get me ready for school. I now had to do this myself and help mum prepare for each day and make her breakfast. I also had to support my younger brother when my older sister wasn’t around. It felt like a lot of responsibility.  

“I was finding it challenging balancing school and home life. My friends didn’t understand why I would say I couldn’t hang out with them after school. When my teachers eventually realised I was a young carer that’s when I started getting support from Barnardo’s.” 

How we helped Zain and his family 

“For families like mine where a parent cannot work, it’s often really difficult to make ends meet. A lot of families are struggling due to the high cost of living and over the years Barnardo’s has provided me with financial assistance, such as helping to pay for food when money has been tight and made sure I can enjoy activities and days out with other young carers.  

“Barnardo’s support workers are fun, but also proactive and they make sure there’s appropriate support at home for the whole family. It can often be really slow and challenging for families to get help from social services, but when Barnardo’s becomes involved that’s when it can really speed things up as the charity works in partnership with a lot of other organisations,” he says. 

With our help, Zain’s brother has also been able to start driving lessons so he can help take his mum to hospital appointments and other important places when Zain and their dad are at work. “It’s not possible for my mum to physically get on a bus due to her disability and there’s no way as a family we could have afforded the driving lessons. It’s a simple thing that will make a massive difference to our family, but I feel the Government needs to strengthen awareness and make it easier for young carers to get support.”

Reflecting on his own support journey, Zain says, “I first started getting support from Barnardo’s through one-to-one sessions and then when I felt confident enough, moved to the group sessions where I’ve been able to make friends with other young carers. We would go to the park and have picnics, play bowling and learn new skills like candle making.  

“I think for a lot of children and young people, when it’s mentioned to them that they’ll be getting support from a professional it can make them feel reluctant. As a teenager, it’s natural to want to do everything yourself, but there are times you just need that additional support from someone who you can trust to help you navigate a challenge at home, and Barnardo’s is here to help with that.”