Rowan a single adopter smiles while playing with his son.

Rowan’s story: What it’s like to adopt as a single parent

Rowan always wanted to be a parent and after splitting from a long-term partner he decided it was the right time. Fast forward to today and Rowan is now a single dad to a wonderful five-year-old boy. 

Rowan wanted to be a parent for as long as he can remember. He separated from his long-term partner just before lockdown and moved from London back to Nottinghamshire to be closer to family. At this point he felt it was time to start his adoption journey and that with enough support from friends and family, he could change the life of someone in care. After a long chat with someone from Barnardo’s he knew he was doing the right thing.

The first time Rowan met his son is a day he will never forget.  

A close up of Rowan who adopted as a single parent
I’d heard and read so much about him, as well as discussing a lot with his foster family, but all that doesn’t quite prepare you for the emotional impact of actually meeting him. We met at a soft play and the first thing he did was hand me his shoes so he could go and play. Before long we were going down the slides together holding hands. It was very hard saying goodbye, knowing it would be a few weeks before I’d see him again

Rowan

The adoption process

Rowan advises those considering adoption that the process can seem slow. The matching period especially can be long and emotionally challenging. "But," he says "it’s definitely worth it in the end.”

Rowan and his son have now been living together for a few months, his son is settling in well, and is very proud to have his own bedroom with his name on the door.

Rowan says about him "He’s always got a smile and has tons of energy; he really keeps me on my toes!" The two of them love to play, they share a passion for Lego and love to build together.

Rowan’s advice to other single adopters would be to ensure that you have the right support network in place whether it’s for practical support such as helping with the shopping during the early days of a placement, or more emotional support.​​​​​

A close up of Rowan who adopted as a single parent
Talk to your friends and family and help them to understand what’s in store, and check to see what help they will realistically be able to offer. Being a parent is amazing, and I’m so happy I’ve been able to give my son a loving home, but it is hard work. I don’t think I prepared myself for quite how tired I’d be!

Rowan
  • Two children with their arms round each other

    Adopt a child

    Read about adopting with us – who can adopt, the training and support we offer, the kinds of children who need loving families to adopt them, plus real-life stories from Barnardo's adopters.

  • A boy and man smiling sit next to each other at a table

    Adoption process

    We understand the decision to adopt is a huge step and we'll provide you with support every step of the way. Find out more about the journey to adoption.

  • A young teenage boy and a man wearing a Barnardo's lanyard smiling

    Enquire about adopting


    Complete our online form or find details about alternative contact methods here and one of our friendly, expert staff will contact you for a no obligation chat.